the voice he wants to hear the most isn't in the song. however, yifan can hear it still.Warning/s:
none really??? lapslock??Notes:
sort of like a follow up to 再次分开
i guess; written when my internet was down last night and i was listening to a version of exo's 'miracles in december' where OP had added rain and thunderstorm in the background -- link to the audio here
(i can't find the original version of the audio i had downloaded, but the rain and all was quieter in that version...). unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.
the storm's rough outside. the thunder and lightning crackling and booming with the constant pattering of rain accompanying it. despite the apparent storm brewing out in the city, the voices singing inside the penthouse apartment soar over the noise. they blend in nicely with the background storm, rather than cut through it.
the song's being sung in korean, and though it's been months - which feels more like years - yifan remembers the lyrics all too well. even though he wasn't the one singing the song, he knows the lyrics - ones he used to mouth along while watching music show performances of it.
there are three distinct voices singing the lyrics - baekhyun, kyungsoo, jongdae. it's been a long time since yifan's heard them, and he guesses that's mostly his doing. now, he doubts either of them would really want to talk to him.
yifan closes his eyes and leans against the wide window, the raining hitting steadily against the glass. the voice he wants to hear the most isn't in the song. however, yifan can hear it still. the voice is in his memories, softly whisper-singing the lyrics along with the song.
the owner of that voice would often do that, while watching the music show broadcasts. curled up against yifan's tall body, he'd quietly sing along with the three other members performing on the actual stage on tv. yifan, then, used to just smile slightly and wrap his arm around the other boy's shoulder and pull him in closer.
yifan misses the warm presence of the other boy's body next to his.
yifan guesses the absence of it is also his fault.
as the voices crescendo slowly into the ending part, yifan opens his eyes and picks up his phone. a strong crackle from the thunder sounds outside and yifan opens up his inbox. without second guessing, he clicks on the create message button and types out a small message in korean.
the characters haven't become strange yet. they're still awfully familiar. it's a strange kind of nostalgia. the five years of training and two years of performing are tough to forget.
yifan's thumb hovers over the send message button, and in the background, the song slowly reaches its fading end as the thunderstorm also comes to an end. there's only a soft patter of rain as yifan finally pushes the small green button.
his eyes watch the rotating symbol, waiting for the message to send. when the message's finally sent, the song also strums out its final notes.
yifan waits for any kind of regret to hit him, slightly surprised when he finds relief in its place instead.
gently, he places his phone back on the table and leans back on the sofa, closing his eyes and waiting for the next song to begin.
the phone screen eventually turns dark, and hides the message sent to a person in another country.
"i'm sorry junmyeon."